• ABOUT
  • STEPHEN GARRETT
  • SUBMISSIONS
  • CORE CONTRIBUTORS
  • CONTACT

We Can Die Better

Bringing Death Back To Life

Classic Cremation
  • Dying and Death
  • The Grief Journey
  • Alternative Funeral Services
  • Celebration of Life
  • End of Life Planning
  • :: Training

Death of a Relationship is Full of Grief

June 29, 2018 By sgarrett Leave a Comment

Lost Is What Was and What Was Yet to Be

 

Human death is only one of the ‘deaths’ we as individuals get to experience. There are many other losses we experience throughout our lives that mimic death and the ending of a relationship is one of them.

Divorce is absolutely a death. The relationship started as an idea, two people engaged in the idea and gave it life, and the couple ended it – it died! There is very real grief involved in the loss and often one partner feels it more so than the other, they both feel the loss differently depending on whether you we the one leaving or the one left.

The one leaving is generally a little ahead on their grief journey as they pre-grieved the loss as they were likely thinking about it for some time.

The one being left is often surprised by the loss and beings their grief process after the ‘announcement’.

Both grieve the loss just a different times and in different ways.

What is more; the couple are not only grieving the loss of their relationship as it was they are also grieving all future dreams they once had for their lives together. Perhaps trips, vacation times, grandchildren, and retirement – the list can go on. So the loss has two edges and does get messy unless the partners are able to notice all the very different aspects of their grief.

Anger at each other is often a common reaction as the couple step through the initial phase of their ending; resentment, confusion, disbelief and overwhelm also join the grief dance.

Just like the death of a loved one!

So treat your divorce as a death, prepare for the grief; get ready for those notable dates that will trigger more grief; do a ritual or ceremony; bury it. Bring it to an end. Let it die as it once was, especially if the couple has children. Letting it die as it was creates the space necessary for it to be reborn in a new form that will support the co-parenting efforts.

Grief is a normal and natural human response to the end of things, relationship IS one of those things that dies too.

Filed Under: Dying and Death, The Grief Journey

Learn more about End Of Life Guide Training with Stephen Garrett

A 12 Lesson Training that is available online and self-paced.

Learn more and sign up

 

sgarrett

About sgarrett

Death is one of North America’s biggest taboos. No one wants to talk about it, so we suffer bad deaths. We can die better, come find out how. Start by subscribing via rss or e-mail.

Leave a Reply Cancel reply

Your email address will not be published. Required fields are marked *

EMAIL NEWSLETTER

Sign up to receive updates!

Receive the Free Guides!

All-Ready-to-Go-Create-Your-Own-Death-Binder All-Ready-To-Go-Talking-With-The-Funeral-Director All-Ready-To-Go-Talking-With-The-Children

My Life jo-URN-ey – Begin with the End In Mind

My Life jo-URN-ey – Begin with the End In Mind

February 26, 2021 By sgarrett

If There Is Healing, There Can Be No Blame

February 22, 2021 By sgarrett

Grief – A Breathtaking Teacher

Grief – A Breathtaking Teacher

October 18, 2020 By sgarrett

Stop!

Stop!

September 25, 2020 By sgarrett

  • 
  • 
  • 
  • 
  • 

Advertisement

The mission of We Can Die Better is to generously serve readers with contemporary, accurate, and well researched information regarding the intimate and important process of dying, death and grief and to do so with boldness, compassion, creativity and humor.

Recent Posts

  • My Life jo-URN-ey – Begin with the End In Mind
  • If There Is Healing, There Can Be No Blame
  • Grief – A Breathtaking Teacher
  • Stop!
  • Pets are Family Too!
Uncopyright Stephen Garrett & Just Alive Consulting